Here's an Idea...

As I sit here and listen to the pitter patter of rain drops on my greenhouse window in my kitchen, I've decided to post one final response to her latest post which you can read here. And, I do have one thing to say...

If you're tired of hearing about it, stop reading my journals! If you want me to "leave you alone" then just quit reading my journals! That's all it takes. It's a simple idea really.

I would also like to add that I believe this whole mess was started as a means to an end. Not by me mind you, but by Alicia. This whole thing was a way for her to get out of a "friendship" that she felt either trapt in [although I don't know why] or she simply didn't have the guts to say it to my face; so she had to make up a reason in her head. But, at least I say it out loud, and unambiguous....although I suppose I'll just be accused of not being tactful. Whatever.

One last song to finish it all off...

Don't Go Away Mad (Just Go Away)
by: Motley Crue

We could sail away
Or catch a freight train
Or a rocketship into outer space
Nothin' left to do
Too many things were said
To ever make it feel
Like yesterday did

Seasons must change
Separate paths, separate ways
If we blame it on anything
Let's blame it on the rain

I knew it all along
I'd have to write this song
Too young to fall in love <~~more friendship than anything
Guess we knew it all along

That's alright, that's okay
We were walkin' through some youth
Smilin' through some pain
That's alright, that's okay
Let's turn the page My friends called today
Down from L.A.
They were shooting pool all night
Sleeping half the day
They said I could crash
If I could find my own way
I told them you were leaving
On a bus to go away

That's alright, that's okay
We were two kids in love <~once again, friendship (or so I thought)
Trying to find our way
Thats's alright, that's okay
Held our dreams in our hands
Let our minds run away
That's alright, that's okay
We were walkin' through some youth
Smilin' through some pain
That's alright, let's turn the page
And remember what I say girl
And it goes this way

Girl, don't go away mad...
Girl, just go away


Go ahead, and press it if it'll make you feel better. For some people I suppose a quick fix is better than the real thing.

Bitter Much?

Thank you Anne Taintor.

I surely hope that THIS isn't something directed toward me. Because that would just be the pot calling the kettle black now wouldn't it??

Except for the whore part, cause I'm not one of those. And once again, it's not being vain if you're right, it's called being correct. Dang. Eh, fuck it, if I'm vain then I'm vain. Whatever. Until it's actually cleared up [directly to me] I'm just going to be vain.

But I am happy for you, now you belong. Really. That's what you wanted since you got here, just to belong. Now you can sleep better at night....and what a coincidence, so can I.

Godless...

Today, while driving home from work, I was being annoyed by a big car (2 cars ahead of me) that was going approx. 20 in a 25. Already in a slow zone and he's going slow. But, being that it was Poulsbo (possibly the retirement capital of the Northwest!) I let it slide because I was sure it was some old guy.

When he finally turned a corner out of my direct path, I saw his vanity plate. It read...GODSEES

This bothers me. Not personally mind you, but for the man. Because truly a life lived in that kind of devotion to God, is a life lived in fear. And that makes me sad.

Time to Burn Some Bridges of My Own...

With so many ideas for my blog today, this one was just too good to pass up! For anyone who reads my blog and the saga of Alica and I, I'm sure you read the blog "I'm Sorry, So Sorry"

This is a reply to that post in LiveJournal, from an Anonymous person, who apparently knows her from Texas....

Their reply was:
Subject: Don't worry, Alicia has always been two-faced!!
She's always been like that. You know, She used to be best friends with Carl's ex and talked about how shitty he was for the things he did to her right up until she decided she wanted to date him. Don't take it personal. She burns a lot of bridges.

Now, I don't want to scare anyone away; I just thought it was interesting that someone decided to use the term two-faced to describe Alicia with no persuasion. I meerly said that JESSICA was two-faced. And weather you believe it or not, it's true. So maybe you should get over it, you know who you are.

In light of this new comment, I thought a song was appropriate. I just love to dedicate songs to people, especially when they describe them so well. This one goes out to Alicia....Here's lookin' at you kid!

Not If You Were The Last Junkie On Earth
The Dandy Warhols

I never thought you'd be a junkie
because heroin is so passe.
But today,
if you think that I don't know
about depression and
emotional pain,
you're insane, or your
a fool who hasn't paid attention
to a word that I say.

In a way, I can't
help but feel responsible.
I always knew that you were insane
with your pain.

But I never thought you'd be a junkie
because heroin is so passe
now a-day.
You never thought you'd get addicted,
just be cooler in an obvious way.
I could say, shouldn't you have got
a couple piercings and decided
may-be that you were gay.

In a way
I can't help but feel responsible,
I always knew that you were insane
with your pain
But I never thought you'd be a junkie
because
heroin is so passe hey.(repeat)

P.S. Blocking people only makes them sure of the fact that you are talking shit about them. If you really wanted to be "grown up" about it, all that wouldn't matter; and you wouldn't give a shit who read your blog/journal. I'm just sayin...

It's So Me...

My mom unwittingly sent me this in an email...if she only knew...



I know it's not entirely accurate, but it's in the region! lol

Perpetually Fat

This post is about something that bothers me day in a day out. Probably because I'm closer to it than anyone I know who reads this. However, there may be someone who is reading this blog that understands [truly] where I am comming from.

From the time I entered high school, I started to gain weight. And from then on it's been an uphill battle. I think possibly my body just decided to shift in a direction that was more "genetically pleasing" and I became pudgy. Having always been small (a size 9 was really fat for me when I was in Jr. High, now I double that number) this was a huge psychological problem for me. Not only was I entering high school, the dreaded domain of the cheer leader and reign of the preppy gods, but I was also gaining weight. In the years to follow it made me utterly miserable.

Turning to my mother for support, I got nothing. Well, I suppose I can't say nothing, I got all kinds of bribes. I've been told "if you lose weight we'll send you to Disneyland!" or "if you lose weight we'll send you to Hawaii!" Right, just what I needed, something to make me feel worse about myself, and remind me how bad I look in a bikini, or even shorts for that matter.

It was these kind of parenting skills that lead me to crash diet just about every diet out there, that I could eat. Being allergic to several foods, I wasn't able to do the grapefruit diet and the like. Also, the ones I couldn't possibly afford have also been out of my reach, like Jenny Craig. Not that I want to be Kirsty Alley or anything, but I digres.

I've tried the eat every 3 hours diet, I've tried cutting out all the carbs aka the Atkins diet, I've tried eating nothing but a bag of M&M's and a Diet Coke, and I've even done it the healthy way by exercising 5 days a week for an hour and a half and eating correctly. Also among these diets have been an abundance of diet pills, from apple cider pills to TrimSpa to Metabolife and even Herbalife. But all to no avail.

Recently I've been diagnosed with a condition that is caused basically by being of child baring age (20-40 years old) and overweight, and they have no idea why it strikes some women and not others. It's called papiloedema, and it can cause me to go blind. The long and short of it is I have too much spinal fluid and it's causing pressure on my occular nerves. But, luckily I've been able to be set up with a nutritionist.

Finally, I'm hoping that it'll be someone that will tell me what I'm doing wrong and or right, and get me the fuck off of medication. Honestly, I could give two shits weather or not I lose a bunch of weight as long as I can get off of all the damned medication they've got me on.

I was told that seeing a nutritionist wasn't going to be covered by my medical insurance; but I have a sly doctor. He changed the wording around for me, and viola I've got a referal to see a nutritionist at no cost to me! I still have to call the guy; so we'll see if it turns out to be a real nutritionist or some guy that says to me "you need to eat less and exercise more!" bla bla bla...been there done that, it didn't work!

And just in case you're wondering, I'm not a fat lazy bitch that sits around the house and eats everything in sight because she's bored and then wonders why she's so fat. I work 2 jobs that frequently keep me out of the house for 12-15 hours of the day. At which time I don't eat at all. I eat breakfast before I leave for my first job, and then if I'm lucky I'll eat something for dinner when I get home.

I just get so tired of being stereotyped into that category of people who are fat because they eat too much and are lazy. I suppose I do have society and the media to blame for that one. And I'm not trying to be a cop out, but could I just be fat because I'm genetically pre-disposed?

I'm happy now, and I'm extremely lucky that I found a man that loves me weather I'm Kirsty Alley fat, or Lindsay Lohan skinny. He'd rather see me happy and healthy, but he loves me and thinks I'm beautiful no matter what; and for that I appreciate him more than I could ever express. And slowly, I'm peeling back the layers of damage done to me by my mom and her misguided attempts to "make" me lose weight. But somehow I can't help but think that this isn't my fault. Not that I don't want to take responsibility; because believe me I'd be the first to step in and stop whatever action I was doing that was making me fat if I knew what it was.

I dunno, I'm just so tired of being perpetually fat.

Fucking Pumpkins!

So, if you're thinking about carving pumpkins this year it's a great idea...really. However, you had better get started because Halloween is only a week away.

That being said, you see that really cool white pumpkin at the top of my blog? That was a fucking bitch and a half to carve! I did it, all by myself, with no electric saw or anything like that. It turned out pretty cool if I do say so myself. But the roughly 3 hours it took me to finish was torture!

Those fuckers have like a 3 inch thick rhind! I got it all gutted, and cut only to find out that the pumpkin saw I was using didn't penetrate deep enough to make the cuts all the way through! So a lot of it was done with a steak knife in the end. But it turned out pretty kick ass! I can't wait to put a candle in it tonight!

Just in case you're curious these are the "real" pumpkins we did also...



Leo did the skull on the top and I did the dracula thingy on the bottom. It was fun; and a definate must for our Halloween tradition.

I love this holiday! Even if it does include stupid white pumpkins!

YAY!

Tom Smykowski: Well alright, it was a "Jump to Conclusions" mat! It would be this mat, that you would put on the floor, and it would have different conclusions written on it, that you could jump to!

Michael: That is the worst idea I have ever heard in my life, Tom.

Samir: Yes, yes, it's horrible... this idea.

Hop Hop Hop! This is fun! I think I'll patent it since I'm so good at jumping to conclusions....Weeeeee....

I'm too tired for this shit tonight...In fact I'm just too tired for it for a really long time....


New Banter bla bla bla Click Here to See It

I'm Sorry....So Sorry....

Apparently, I'm so vain...because the blog was about me. I don't suppose that makes me vain, but it does make me right. Any way, here is my response to the recent snap in my direction in the recent post in Alicia's Live Journal.

And before I reply, I would like to add one thing...I DO HAVE A FUCKING PHONE! PICK IT UP AND ACTUALLY CALL ME LIKE A REAL HUMAN AND WORK IT OUT! 535-7436 or 440-1892! I know you have these numbers!!

Now, on to the rest.

I'M SORRY

that I ever stood up for you when Jessica would trash you behind your back.

that I went to your play and tried to be a supportive friend.

that I tried not to hurt your feelings by posting a nice comment where I thought you read my blogs.

that I was your first friend, when you didn't know anyone, and I stuck by you.

that I would listen to your constant jabbering about yourself, with no intermission (or care usually) for what was really going on my life.

that my husband helped your husband out, when other people on the boat called him unsavory names behind his back.

that you can't figure out how to call me and work shit out over coffee, or tea, or movie, or dinner, or simply conversation.

that I don't have a baby. (nuf said)

that I ever cared what was going on in your life, and asked you about it; even when you never did the same for me.

that I speak my opinions and it bothers you that I "have no tact."

that you never ONCE asked me to go to lunch and or tea with you at The Victorian Tea House...even though you and Jessica go there all the time.

that I stayed your friend after you made me feel like Jessica talking shit about other people behind their backs was my fault.

that you still never added me to your "friends list" on LiveJournal.

that I was supportive of every decision that you made, including Rocky, Modeling, Mary Kay, The Body Shop, Ebay, Sewing and this play.

But mostly, I'm sorry because you probably didn't even notice. And although I'm sure all of this sounds harsh, and like I "have no tact." I hope you can take a moment to reflect on these facts. I'm sure you've probably already written me off any way....I'm sure it's easy to do when you've become my enemy's new best friend. She's probably poured all kinds of poison in your ear.

Just a final thought for the day: Why the hell do people need other people in their lives to justify themselves? Why do we care so much what other people think of us? I suppose it doesn't matter when 2 of your "best friends" just write you off without a single thought about it. But I also suppose that I'll be just fine, and so will the rest of the world tomorrow when I open my eyes to a new morning.

Now, enough sappy shit, let's get on with the day!

FREAK!

My fat ass cat has gone too far! Tonight while sitting in my lap and getting pet, she started to sniff my hand. I thought nothing of it until she started to lick it; and then my thought was "aww how cute, she loves me" And then she bit me!

It was like she was trying to eat me! YIKES! Maybe I've let this fat thing get out of hand with her...

Bloggin Away...

I checked my friend Alicia's LiveJournal today, and she's written something about someone talking shit about her behind her back. **cough cough JESSICA cough cough** [Because she used to do so much of it before she became her new buddy (after I stopped talking to her).] Any way, I digres. I thought it would be funny to post something about her journal in my blog! So, in tribute to Alicia's Journal Entry...

You're So Vain...

You walked into the party like you were walking onto a yacht
You had strategically dipped below one eye
Your scarf it was apricot
You had one eye in the mirror
When you watched yourself gavotte
And all the girls dreamed that they'd be your partner
They'd be your partner and

You're so vain
You probably think this blog is about you
You're so vain
I'll bet you think this blog is about you
Don't you don't you

You had me several years ago
When I was still quite naive
Well, you said that we made such a pretty pair
And that you would never leave
But you gave away the things you loved
And one of them was me
I had some dreams they were clouds (clowns?) in my coffe Clouds (clowns?) in my coffe
and

You're so vain
You probably think this blog is about you
You're so vain
I guess you think this blog is about you
Don't you don't you

I had some dreams they were clouds (clowns?) in my coffe
Clouds (clowns?) in my coffe and

You're so vain
You probably think this blog is about you
You're so vain
I'll bet you think this blog is about you
Don't you don't you

Well, I hear you went up to Saratoga
And your horse naturally won
Then you flew your Lear jet up to Nova Scotia
To see the total eclipse of the sun
Well you're where you should be all the time
And when you'e not you're with
Some underworld spy or the wife of a close friend
Wife of a close friend and

You're so vain
You probably think this blog is about you
You're so vain
I'll bet you think this blog is about you
Don't you don't you

HOLY CRAP! Clowns in my coffee?? It's scary enough that people have to communicate through blogs nowadays, but to add clowns to my coffee, that's just fuct up! Clowns scare the crap out of me!

I don't claim to be, or even really know who this person is she's talking about...because I'm not so vain....but I thought a tribute was in order...

This is not the greatest blog in the world...this is just a tribute!

holy crap, 2 song references in 1 blog, I'm good!

Recap and PS

Just a quick recap and a P.S. to anyone reading this. I love my friend Alicia, but the performance I saw yesterday could have been better. That's all I'm sayin.

They're Comming to Get You Barbara....GET OFF THE STAGE!

Today I FINALLY had the day off, so I got to spend some time with my grandma and my mother (before she leaves for Italy). I did my grandma's nails and then we went to lunch at The Victorian Tea Room in Port Orchard; incredibly cute and great food! Then we went to see The Night of the Living Dead at the Port Orchard Theater.

My friend Alicia is playing the role of Barbara in it and I've been wanting to go since it opened to see her act (having never actually seen her act although also having been reasured that she does it VERY well and should be on Broadway; according to her). She IM'd me this morning to tell me that there was a 2:30 matinee and that I should go, and like a good and obiedient friend I went.

Ouch! Personally I'm glad that I didn't pay the $10 fee to get in; luckily my grandma paid for all 3 of us. 3 Of the main characters kept stuttering through their lines (mind you this is not opening weekend), so the acting was a little sub par to say the least. Now, I can't say that I expect Broadway out of these people, or even really Seattle Theater out of them, they're doing it for free and for fun. But still, it was a little painful to watch.

Of corse the play was in grey scale; not a good choice. Half the people in makeup had only done a few body parts or the grey wasn't fully covering their skin. It was hard to look at it like it was in black and white. Also, they truncated it so much that you basically got a quick run down of a cult classic movie. So, I shouldn't be too terribly surprised when Alicia's "main role" got cut down to practically 10 lines. All of which were very overacted and a little too melodramatic for my taste. However, she can scream!

My friend Ray was also in the play, and for having such a small part, he was fantastic! But I've seen Ray act before and strongly believe that he should be acting in movies, or at least Broadway.

So, my official overview....If you're not doing anything for the day and need to kill roughly an hour and a half, and don't care how you do it, go see the play. But if you're looking for a really great show, I wouldn't bother this time.

They're Comming to Get Your Barbara....now GET OFF THE STAGE!

Sweet Sweet Revenge...

EVER HAVE ONE OF THESE DAYS?

I think I might be having one of these weeks. Although I might be more apt to point it at my head instead. I'm so fucking busy it's not even funny!

Tis the Season...

Today, for me, has been a pretty bad day. Just a series of disappointments really; followed by a very long car trip {alone} to Olympia to take my manicurist written test. Which I promptly failed in Lacey and had to drive back to Olympia to pay for again. Any way, long story short, it hasn't been good.

I can say however that the first thing that brought a smile to my face all day were two cars, or rather their lisence plates, on the way home. No, not in Olympia or even Tacoma, it was all the way out here in Silverdale.

I was getting on the freeway from picking up my schedule at Shari's and I got on the freeway behind a big black car with a lisence plate that said "BIRD". And I started to think to myself, how funny it's kindof like a big black crow (tis the season right?). Then not even 30 seconds later at the next on ramp a little yellow mazda sports car gets on the freeway with a lisence plate that says "CORN". I had to laugh at the irony of it all. The little corn car and the big black bird car. The only thing better would have been if the bird car somehow ate the little yellow corn car; or at least wrecked it, but it made me smile.

Like I said...Tis the Season...

In Your Face!

In your face DL Roope! I fucking passed my practical manicurist boards yesterday!! Stupid fucking bureaucratic, slimy, self serving, rude, obnoxious, self richeous bastards! I wish I had the money to sue their ass because if I had the time and money to go through the process I would put that fucking company out of business!

But they can all kiss my ass because I'm done with their bullshit and their not passing people (policy) because they don't like the way they look, or talk, or if they have tattoos etc. Fuck em all!

IN-YOUR-FACE!

Word of the Day

The word of the day is Moo.

moo - n :the sound made by a cow or bull v :make a low noise, characteristic of bovines

Fuck Yes I'll Eat It!

Today I am absolutely giddy with excitement!! I finally got enough time in my schedule to call some nutritionists.

Seeing as how I'm "going blind because I'm too fat" according to my bastard doctor; I figured I needed a good nutritionist. My dreams of skinny jeans were smashed when I called my doctor to get a referral to one. I was told that my medical insurance won't cover a nutritionist, even though I'm going blind because I'm fat and need to lose weight!! Fuckers!

So, today I finally got time to take matters into my own hands. I called and talked to 1 of the 2 in the phone book and she sounds like she really knows what she's talking about. And get this, not only can she help me lose weight, but she thinks she can help me with my (many) food allergies AND all my health problems!! I can't friggin wait!

She's sending me a little quiz thingy to help isolate where my problems are comming from (like my small intestine or kidneys), and she's also sending me some paperwork to fill out which includes a 3 day food diary.

I'm not saying that I'm too terribly jazzed about the possibility of having to become a vegitarian **cough cough Erika (Freak) cough cough** or worse having to eat everything raw. But at this point in my life I'm willing to try just about anything to get to stop taking all this damned medication, and fix my sinus problems; oh yea, and not go blind of corse.

So like I said before Fuck Yes I'll Eat It!

I've Been Gypped!

First, I'd just like to say that I'VE BEEN GYPPED!! Everyone on my block has these beautiful trees that are all turning wonderful colors of orange and yellow and red; as is the season of Fall. Here's what their trees all look like...



Now, not that I'm greedy or anything, but living in Washington State basically my whole life we don't get to see this that often. And my block is lined with these beauties.....except for my tree! I get the dead ass tree with not a single leaf! All the leaves in my yard are from the neighbors trees! This is what my tree looks like....



Now, to be fair, my tree looks like this year round, and normally it doesn't bother me. But I love the fall and winter seasons. And one of the main reasons I love the fall is because of the beautiful color changes. It seems like everyone gets to look out their little windows and see beautiful, colorful trees and I look out my window and see....dead, mossy branches.

Not to sound like I'm complaining too much, after all it is a free tree. But I do pay to live here (sortof) and I feel gypped! First crabgrass and now a dead tree. I suppose in about a month it won't matter, because everyone on the block will have a tree like mine. Maybe I'll just look at it as trend setting.

Yea, trend setting....I've always been a trend setter, I'm just getting a jump on it this year!

Now, a few words on the meaning of the word "gypped" just in case you're curious

The verb gyp, meaning 'to cheat; swindle; defraud' and usually found in the passive, is one of those words that has received attention due to the possibility of offending ethnic sensitivities.
Gyp is derived from Gypsy. Though the noun Gyp meaning 'a Gypsy' has always been very rare, the noun gyp meaning 'a thief or swindler', first recorded in the 1850s, has been relatively common for most of the century, and gyp verb, from 1880, is quite common indeed.

First, we should observe that the very word Gypsy is sometimes objected to. This word is derived from Egyptian, under the mistaken belief that the Gypsies were from Egypt. (In fact they are originally from northern India.) The people refer to themselves as the Roma, after Rom 'a Gypsy man', ultimately derived from a Sanskrit word meaning 'a low-caste musician'.

In relatively recent times--since the mid-1980s or so--some people have objected to the word gyp on the grounds that it is offensive to the Roma, since it stereotypes them as swindlers. It should be noted that the word gyp has apparently never been used as a deliberate ethnic slur, and many people are unaware even that gyp is derived from Gypsy. Thus gyp may be perceived as offensive, but it is never used with such intent.

Now, don't you all feel enlightened??

Jennifer Tilly is Gummy

While watching the usual boring tv tonight I came to a realization. Jennifer Tilly is indeed desperate. I always thought she was; I mean if starring in Chucky movies so far past their time **cough cough Seed of Chucky cough cough** isn't enough to convince you, she's now doing gum commercials.

Yes, that's right folks, she's trying to make gum sexy! I had to throw back my head and let out a big hearty laugh as the Dentyne company made a very sad attempt to sex up their product. HA! It's frickin gum, come on, how sexy can chewing on a piece of wet, soft, sweet and tasty substance be? Oh....right....nevermind.

Ahem! Any way, the commercial goes something like this....A piece of Dentyne Ice strips off it's "hard" outer shell to become a soft and chewy new piece of gum. While Jennifer Tilly tries her damndest to make it sound sexy.

I may be mistaken, but shouldn't it be the other way around that's arousing? Soft to hard?

Now, I don't know, I've never tried this new gum; it may be very tasty. However, I do like the crispity crunchity (insert peanut buttery when appropriate...mmMMMMmmm Butterfinger!) outer shell of Dentyne Ice. I think it gives it a little more substance, and fun! But hey, who am I to say that the new soft gum isn't great? Who am I to say that going from hard to soft isn't the new sexy?

Personally, I prefer them hard.

It's Official...

"The human eye is the organ which gives us the sense of sight, allowing us to learn more about the surrounding world than we do with any of the other four senses. We use our eyes in almost every activity we perform, whether reading, working, watching television, writing a letter, driving a car, and in countless other ways. Probably most people would agree that sight is the most precious of the five senses, and many people fear blindness more than any other disability."

Finally after a week of waiting for the damn doctor to call me, I got through to his office. Which conveniently closes at 4 friggin 30! I called on Friday at 4:34! Any way, I'm starting on my medication to treat my papiloedema. I really sux, but this way I shouldn't lose my sight.

I suppose I'm actually looking foreward to someone professional having to tell me why I'm so fat, and what I can do to fix it; because between you and me I've tried just about every damned thing on the fucking planet and can't seem to get rid of it. So, here's hopin!

Support Gay Marriage

I don't usually post this kind of stuff because I hate it when other people do it. But I thought it was great!

10 Reasons Why Gay Marriage is Wrong

1) Being gay is not natural. Real Americans always reject unnatural things like eyeglasses, polyester, and air conditioning.

2) Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that hanging around tall people will make you tall.

3) Legalizing gay marriage will open the door to all kinds of crazy behavior. People may even wish to marry their pets because a dog has legal standing and can sign a marriage contract.

4) Straight marriage has been around a long time and hasn't changed at all; women are still property, blacks still can't marry whites, and divorce is still illegal.

5) Straight marriage will be less meaningful if gay marriage were
allowed; the sanctity of Brittany Spears' 55-hour just-for-fun marriage would be destroyed.

6) Straight marriages are valid because they produce children. Gay couples, infertile couples, and old people shouldn't be allowed to marry because our orphanages aren't full yet, and the world needs more children.

7) Obviously gay parents will raise gay children, since straight parents only raise straight children.

8) Gay marriage is not supported by religion. In a theocracy like ours, the values of one religion are imposed on the entire country. That's why we have only one religion in America.

9) Children can never succeed without a male and a female role model at home. That's why we as a society expressly forbid single parents to raise children.

10) Gay marriage will change the foundation of society; we could never adapt to new social norms. Just like we haven't adapted to cars, the service-sector economy, or longer life spans

HAHAHAHA I just love the closed minded don't you?

Now, Children

Having turned on the Emmy's tonight, like I'm sure over half of America did, I was plagued by something. This happens every time I watch a "live" show. That damned warning at the bottom of the screen RECORDED FROM AN EARLIER BROADCAST. DAMNIT!!

Having grown up on the west coast, and still living here, I should come to expect it; but it still pisses me off. I feel like we're the children of the US. The east coast gets to view the live show before we see it; and then without doubt all the badness is bleeped out by the time it gets to us! Which explains why I never got to see Janet Jackson's nipple.

And, I get immensely irritated when something like this come across the screen... ALL PHONE LINES ARE NOW CLOSED TO VOTING...Not that I wanted to vote for the REALLY stupid Emmy Idol performances, but come on! I can't even vote! Don't I count!?! And when it comes to shows like American Idol, I could simply call someone on the east coast and find out who got kicked off, they find out before I do, simply because they're on the right coast.

Why can't they just make it all be on at the same time everywhere? It could be on here at 5, instead of 8, and then show it on the east coast at 8. I mean it's on a Sunday; if you're at work you don't have the typical 9-5 day any way and would probably have missed it any way.

Oh well, I suppose until I move to the east coast (maybe never) I'll have to settle with being America's Child.

I'm Tapped

For the rest of the world that doesn't know what's going on in my life, I've recently been battling the notion that I may have a condition called papiloedema. Where basically my body has decided that it's going to make me go blind....and according to the doctor only because I'm "fat" and of child bearing age. Or I could just have something called pseudo-papiloedema which is totally different, and causes me to see spots in my left eye for the rest of my life; but I won't go blind and there's nothing they can do about it.

So, if it's the 1st (and more ominous) of the two, I can be put on medication and it can be fixed if I lose weight and keep taking my medication; then I won't go blind...or be "fat" any more! YAY! But there's a catch...I had to have a spinal tap.

Ok, I figure I can handle this. After all, at the ripe ole age of 23 I've had 4 major surgeries (one of which my uncle had and ended up with holes in his brain), and I have been on numerous medications for as long as I can remember. Oh yea, I'm fallin apart, and this is just one thing in a long line of crap that's been happening lately. But I digress...

So, today was the big day, I was going to have my first spinal tap. And after everyone telling me that it was going to be really painful, and they were going to put this 4 foot needle into my back (not really, but everyone made it sound that way) I was a little nervous. Until I got to the hospital. They had me put on the hospital gown and wait in a bed while they beraded me with about a bajillion questions, and asking me the same ones over and over and over again.

Finally it was time to be wheeled into the room, and luckily for me Leo got to go with me! The nurse in there, Nichole, was very nice and very cool, so that helped. I had to crawl up on to this table and lay face down with a pillow underneath my stomach, and Leo had to wear this lead apron. He looked kinda like a Ken Doll, like he had ambiguous male parts underneath! lol

They cleaned my back and put down the little surgical curtian, and then pumped me full of Lidocaine. That was really the worst part of it all. After that was done, I don't think I really felt much of it. I kinda felt the needle go in, but I refused to look at the "x-ray" of my back as he guided the needle to the hole in my spine. Then it was time to pull it out. It hurt, but in a weird way, let me explain. You know when someone scratches their fingernails on the black board and it "hurts" but not really physically, that's kindof how it was. But that was over quickly.

I got to see the liquid that they pulled out. It looked like he had stuck a needle in me and pulled out water! It was crystal clear, and fluid just like water, not thick like blood. It was pretty cool actually.

At this point I'm feeling a bit like a keg just having been tapped; but it's all over and time to get up and go back to the "recovery" room. I could walk afterwards, and got to change back into my clothes quickly. I ordered a sandwich for lunch from the hospital (free food!), and then we went home about a half hour after the procedure.

I've gotten a good headache from the whole ordeal, but now...I go to 11!

Tent Bonding...FINALLY!!

FINALLY!!

Leo and I spent a better part of the afternoon looking for a suitable tent to bond with the sugar babies in. Finally we settled on a small one from Big 5 that was $20. I wish I could have found that elusive $10 one that everyone keeps telling me is out there. We saw some small ones (you know the kid play houses) that were $15 but they all had velcro closure, and I didn't want a houdini on my hands.

Any way, I spent over an hour with them in this tiny tent. And it worked! Well, for the most part. My male (Stitch) was really curious and at the end was crawling all over my head, and even jumped onto my face! lol It scared me and I let out a small yell, and I think I freaked him out a bit. Woops. Even though he was all over me and exploring, I have 4 sore spots on my fingers where the little bugger broke the skin! And those are the only places he broke the skin. OUCH!! I'm really trying not to pull away, but when that happens he draws blood, and not just a little bit he draws pretty major blood.

Poor Lilo was terrified in the corner for most of the encounter. So, unfortunately it didn't work so well for her; not this time any way. I think we're making progress though, cause I only got crabbed at twice, once when I took them out of the pouch and once when I uncovered her from a towel on the floor. They were so cute burrowing underneath the towel and making little tunnels!

Any way, I'm going to be doing this pretty much every night until I get to a good place where Lilo trusts me and Stitch stops biting. YAY it was so fun!

Dick Cheney and My Mom....Conspiracy...

So, I think my Mom and Dick Cheney are in on a conspiracy to ruin my life....well, maybe not ruin it intentionally but seperately they're doing a good job.

Any way, today I got my confirmation. My Mom calls me up and says (this is actual commentary from the conversation)

"Guess who called me!?!"

and so I said jokingly "I dunno, Jesus!"

and she ACTUALLY SAID TO ME "CLOSE!...Dick Cheney!!"

"Now I know you're deluded." I said, but humoring her at the same time.

Apparently my Mom sent an invitation to a BUNCH of people for my Dad's commissioning ceremony for warrant officer in the Navy. And Dick Cheney actually called her to RSVP that he couldn't make it, but contratulations any way. Weird!

She allegedly sent these invitations out to other famous people such as George W. himself and even Robin Williams (because he used to be in the Navy on submarines). She was actually a little peeved that the president hasn't RSVP'd yet. Although Robin Williams has, unfortunately he won't be there (surprise, surprise). But it was nice of him to actually send in the card declining the invite.

So, in conclusion now I know that my Mom is in on some crazy shit; she's even talked to the vice president! Just ask her, she'll tell you everything!

The Last Hold Out

First, a little background on my relationship with my best friend Chris. I've known him since I was in 7th grade, and we've been friends since 8th.

He's probably the only person I still talk to from high school, that hasn't moved out of the area for several different reasons, the #1 being joining the Navy.

Now, that being said, he's my last friend that has joined the military. I have some mixed feelings about it really.

I'm happy for him because I think that the Navy is a great career move, and it will finally provide him with some stability; not to mention get him the fuck out of Port Orchard, WA.

But I'm a little sad, because he was the last hold out. I thought maybe I had found a friend that would remain outside of the military system; if only for himself, because the rest of his family is basically all in the Navy.

I suppose it's all for the best, and I'm happy for him no matter what. But I will miss him when he's stationed far away from me.

Piercings

Well today started off relitively normal. Until my friend Erika called me to invite me to a bachelorette party. It all seemed innocent. So I went about my day since the party wasn't until 8pm.

I applied for her baker's position at Shari's, which pays $10/hr! And we even hung out a few hours before the party. Now, this is where it starts to get interesting.

The party was at a piercing and tattoo place. And really you can't expect me to spend close to 3 hours in one of those places without getting anything done...anyway, it started out as a Passion Party. And then there was supposed to be a stripper.

Well, feeling bored because the stripper didn't show, we started to talk about piercings. And actually I'm more of a tattoo person than a piercing person, but either is fine with me. Eventually the conversation turned to clit piercings. Something I had never really considered getting myself; not that I wouldn't but just not something I had ever considered.

The Passion Paries consultant got hers done tonight, and that fueled the conversation even more. Now, just in case you didn't know clit piercings run around $80, and that kind of money I didn't have. Which I thought was my saving grace until Erika told me she'd pay for mine if I got it done with her.

Never to be one to turn down a free body art offer, I accepted her "dare" and the next thing I know we both had it done! She went first, and of corse she got the guy who does it all the time, and hers was quick and less painful than mine. Then I get the guy who hardly ever does this piercing, and I've got both men down there looking at areas of my body that have only seen a doctor and my husband in the last 3 years! The first guy couldn't do it on his own, so the other guy had to help him; which translates into slowly piercing a very tender part of my nether regions! Of corse it was only probably about 5 seconds of pain, but that was a bitch. Now, it's sore, but that's to be expected I'm sure.

So, in a recap, my evening turned from an innocent bacheolorette party to getting my clit pierced. Of corse I'll be giving Erika free fills on her nails for a few months, but I think it was all worth it to do something I would have never done on my own. Yikes!

Sign Your Life Away

So, finally last night Jay Leno wasn't a rerun, as it has been for about 2 weeks now. And I was SO excited! Or something like that...Any way, he's raising money for hurricaine katrina by having these celebrities sign this Harley and then he's going to auction it off. And it got me thinking, "What would it be like if you could make money just by signing stuff?"

I mean think about it, just because this Harley is signed by people like Samuel L. Jackson and Billy Crystal the value on it is going to double if not more, instantly. Not to mention the fact that it's going to be auctioned off for charity, and those kind of auctions almost certianly go for WAY more than what you'd normally pay for something. I can't imagine what it would be like to have your signature be famous.

It's one of the simplest things that you can do, just sign your name, like you did a thousand times, and it's worth money. And if you're a really big actor it's worth a lot of money! Holy crap!

I wonder what it would be like to be famous just for your signature? You didn't have to be famous or anything, just sign shit and people want to buy it for lots of money. That would be great!

Popularity Contest

What the hell is up with friendships lately? I just don't get it. When I was in high school, my sophomore year, I was really popular. I mean, people I didn't even know knew who I was and would talk to me at random. It was great. And then it all changed my junior year when I went to the college instead of the high school, and all of my cool friends stayed behind. I lost them all. It was tragic really.

But, having been 5 years out of high school I've come to realize I still havn't gained that popularity back. I find myself struggling to get friends back that I havn't spoken to in years, just so I won't be alone. I mean, I'm not truly alone, I am married, but a girl needs some girl friends now and then.

I do have Erika, and that I'm greatful for. But lately I find myslef scrambling to get someone else to talk to because she's leaving me. Which happens in the Navy, they all go away eventually. And I will to, but I still have a year left in this god forsaken shit hole known as The Peninsula. For the most part I hate Navy wives. Just as soon as I find a cool one they move away from me, or become the devil incarnate. IE Erika and Alice moving away, or Jessica turning into the biggest bitch this side of the Mississippi.

All hope is not lost however, my husband is headed to the USS Alaska Gold next week. Erika is only going to be roughly 2 hours away, and I've finally made contact with a friend of mine from a long time ago. All I can hope is that there are some cool wives on the new boat. Here's hopin!

Nastiness in a bowl

I am a HUGE Batman fan! Let me just get that out of the way right now.

So, when I was in the grocery store yesterday I jumped at the chance to buy the new Batman cereal. It looked sortof like Coco Puffs but the puffs were bats and they added white marshmallows. Sounds great right? Wrong.

Not only does it taste a lot like burnt butter with a hint of sugar; it tears up the roof of my mouth worse than ANY brand of Capn' Crunch. I am sad, I had so hoped it would be fabulous. Like I said, I am a HUGE Batman fan.

Now I'm never going to live down the "Why do you need to buy that crap?!?" I got from my husband when I threw it into the cart yesterday.

Wobbly Bee Pen

I have a wobbly bee pen. Seriously. It's a black ball point pen encased in yellow wood with white polka dots. And on top is a wooden bee on a small spring, complete with spring feelers.

Normally it's qute cute, and rather annoying to try to write with. But my mom gave it to me and I can't bring myself to part with it. Although it does write well, and I seem to lose any and all "normal" pens that come across my desk, but the wobbly bee pen endures...sortof like Cher, and some really bad disco songs I won't mention.

I only bring up the bee pen because at the moment I am fighting a MASSIVE migraine (I've taken 2 midrin and 4 Excedrin Migraines and it's still here, I think sleep is the only thing that's going to make it quit), and I found the bee pen while talking to Erika online. Now, it seems to be a source of great entertainment because my head feels like 100lbs and is giving me a high-like feeling. So, wobbling the bee on the top of the pen is hilarious!

I probably look a little like a fat 4 year old on crack, waving a yellow bee pen in front of my face, but for now I'm entertained.

Aplicants Please...

Ok, so I'm back and have a few things to talk about. However, I'm only going to talk about one today. The people who come to America and don't bother to learn English. Now, I'm not a racist and I don't care if you want to move here. I have no problem with people wanting freedom and they think (albeit somewhat falsely - at least until we have a better president, but that's another topic for another day) that comming here will provide them with that. America is a great place to live!

However, this morning while on my way home from the doctor's office, after having been stripped of my bandages, I heard a commercial on the radio that concerned me. It was a commercial for some kind of "mystery shopper" job. And they actually felt the need to say "must be able to read and write English..." and I was stunned. Have I moved to another country without my knowledge?

My biggest point is this, I wouldn't move to say Germany and expect everyone to speak English, I would learn German. So why the hell would you move to America and not bother to learn English? I understand that some people just got here and havn't had the time, but it seems that there's always that (forgive my stereotype) store owner or shop keeper that has lived here for 12-20 years and still doesn't speak English!

Now, I'm all for people who are bi-tri-or even quad-lingual (or whatever it's called when you speak more than 3 languages) and I applaud them. I think that that's a great way to live you life. You can communicate with several different cultures. And, I don't even care if you do speak English and you prefer to speak whatever language you want in public, just as long as you can understand me when I'm talking to you, and vice versa.

The biggest problem is the American Dream is dead. People don't come here to live the American dream any more. People come here because they can get away with shit, and make more money than they can in their home country. Like I said before, I have no problem with immigrants. But PLEASE if you're going to come live here, learn the fucking language!

Holy Gall Stones Bat-Man!

Saturday night started out great! I got a REALLY cool painting for my friend Alice for her new house, from my friend Collin. And, Leo and I got to watch Kung Fu Hustle with Erika and Collin.

We made it home about 11 or so, and about 12 the pain started. Figuring it was just gas (I've had this pain before but it went away in about an hour or so) I took just about every over the counter medication I could get down. While rithing in pain on the couch the floor the bed I was unable to fall asleep, or even come close. So finally at 6am (after 6 hours of agony) I finally woke Leo up and made him take me to the hospital.

By the time I had gotten there I had been breaking out into cold and hot sweats and felt pretty nausious. They put me in a bed and stripped me down into a gown, before giving me the bad news. They took an ultra sound and confirmed that I did have gall stones and that my gall bladder should be removed eventually. But until then the doctor wanted me to basically go on a vegan diet over night.

Luckily (or unluckily depending on how you look at it) for me after he talked to the surgeon it was decided that I would have it removed immediately; since I had been in pain for at this point 9 hours. I am greatful for the morphine that I had gotten through my IV line earlier though. So, at this point I was transferred by ambulance to the Bremerton Harrison Hospital for my surgery.

I only waited about 3 hours or so for my surgery, and it was done that day. So it really was a whirlwind. And I'm home now, so it was incredibly fast. However, I am in a lot of pain, and if my fever continues to climb I'll probably be headed back to the hospital. They gave me Vicodin but it doesn't get rid of the pain, it just knocks me out.

Well, I'm off to pass out on the couch. I'll keep it updated whenever it's possible that I can make it out of bed/couch.

Do babies make you better?

I've been doing some thinking, mainly about people with babies cause so many of my friends (or people I know and knew) have babies. Now, just to be clear this does not pertain to my friend Erika who managed to stay pretty close to the person she was before she had her baby. But mainly this is for people out there in general who have babies, not any one person so don't read anything into it.

Does having a baby make you a better person than the rest of us without babies?

It seems lately that having a baby immediately rockets you into this "higher" status; because all of a sudden you've got someone else to care for who basically tries their damndest to bankrupt you before they leave the house in 18 years (if they even leave at all.) To be perfectly honest you could marry a man or woman who can do the same thing for you; and you don't have to go through 9 months of uncomfortableness and pain.

Sometimes I just feel like people with babies have this presence about them that somehow they're better than those of us without children. Because this woman got knocked up she's better than me, or the next person without a kid in tow. And it's not just the people with kids, a lot of times it's the people behind the checkout counter. People with kids seem to get treated better, depending on if the kid is being good and all that of corse. They just seem to give bigger smiles as if to say "wow, you did it, you popped a kid out!" Or something like that.

I don't know. I'm sure if I ever do decide that I want a kid in my life I'll understand more. Because I'm sure I'm going to get the inevitable "you just don't understand what it's like to have a child" speach from someone. I just don't understand why it would make you any better than the rest of society who opts out of that situation. I guess this is all fueled by the bombardment of pregnant lady advertisement I just can't seem to get away from (or so it seems.)

So for now, I suppose I'll just let it all roll off my back; and keep on livin life not having to look for a babysitter so I can go to the movies.


Don't eat your baby! It was just a blog!!

God Bless Nike

I never thought those words would leave my lips; or fingers in this case. But today while leafing through my new Glamour I came across this great ad. I just had to scan it into the comuter and share it with anyone who might happen to read this. It may be big, but it's a great ad!

Fund-raising for the Perpetually Lazy~ By Beth Quinn

I admire people who walk for charity. Entering a walk-a-thon seems more noble than just writing a check.

Not only do these folks raise money for a good cause, but they suffer in the process. The more bunions and blisters they acquire, the bigger their contribution and the more points they earn in heaven.

I wish I could be like them. But I'm not. I'm lazy.

I'm a lot more inclined to support a worthy cause if I don't have to engage in some kind of hardy physical activity to prove my generosity and good intentions. I'd rather lounge for charity than walk for it.

We need a "thon" for us lazy folks who would be perfectly happy to do something generous if it didn't involve moving briskly. We need a way to be heartfelt, thoughtful, inert slugs. That's why I propose a new fund-raising idea--the sin-a-thon. That's right. Sin for charity.

I figure that at least three of the Seven Deadly Sins would make perfect fund-raising activities: gluttony, sloth, and lust.

Gluttony. Forget about those hot-dog-eating contests. If you're going to engage in gluttony, go for gourmet.

Hold a Scampi-Aux-Echalotes-a-thon. By getting sponsors, the more you eat, the more money you raise for charity.

Or for those with a sweet tooth, instead of consuming six ordinary cream pies for your favorite cause, hold a Scarf-Down-Some-Creme-Brulee-a-thon.

Involve the whole family! It's a great opportunity to teach your kids some French words, even as you get fat for a good cause. You may end up flabby on the outside, but at least you won't lack character on the inside. Gooey gluttony never felt so glorious!

Sloth. Ideal for baby boomers who spent their college years staging sit-ins on American campuses.

This time, though, instead of taking over the college president's office and eating takeout pizza as a defiant expression of protest, hold a sit-in for charity!

Turn your languid lethargy into money-making idleness for those in need. Lounge in the park, stay in bed watching cartoons all weekend, curl up in the BarcaLounger for a week or two. Sponsors pay by the hour for your indolence.

Note: Sloth is not for amateurs. It can be dangerous for those accustomed to a more active lifestyle. If you participate in a sloth-a-thon, make sure you have a spotter with you at all times. And remember to turn yourself over once in a while!

Lust. While a lust-a-thon requires a little more energy than an eat-a-thon or a sloth-a-thon, the personal rewards can be greater.

The rules for this one are up to you. I would just offer the following inspirational tale, which I read about in a recent Ann Landers column:

A man wrote in to tell Ann that every time he and his wife engaged in lust, they put $10 in a jar. When they got enough money saved up, they took a trip. So far, they've been to Italy and Hawaii, and now they're working on a trip to Australia.

I'm not sure why he felt the need to tell Ann Landers about this, but I admire the couple's sensible handling of money, to say nothing of their perseverance and obvious fortitude. And I figure the same approach could be used in a lust-a-thon. The only difference is, the money goes to a worthy cause.

After all, as the old saying goes, charity begins at home.

The Relationship Between Fun and Happiness

I did not write this, however I think it is very true. And a very good read.

The Secret of True Happiness, by Dennis Prayer

I live in the land of Disney, Hollywood and year-round sun. You may think people in such a glamorous, fun-filled place are happier than others. If so, you have some mistaken ideas about the nature of happiness.

Many intelligent people still equate happiness with fun. The truth is that fun and happiness have little or nothing in common. Fun is what we experience DURING an act. Happiness is what we experience AFTER an act. It is a deeper, more abiding emotion. Going to an amusement park or ball game, watching a movie or TV, are fun activities that help us relax, temporarily forget our problems and maybe even laugh. But they do not bring happiness, because their positive effects end when the fun ends.

I have often thought that if Hollywood stars have a role to play, it is to teach us that happiness has nothing to do with fun. These rich, beautiful individuals have constant access to glamorous parties, fancy cars, expensive homes, everything that spells "happiness." But in memoir after memoir, celebrities reveal the unhappiness hidden beneath all their fun: depression, alcoholism, drug addition, broken marriages, troubled children, profound loneliness.

Yet people continue to believe that the next, more glamorous party, more expensive car, more luxurious vacation, fancier home will do what all the other parties, cars, vacations, homes have not been able to do.

The way people cling to the belief that a fun-filled, pain-free life equals happiness actually diminishes their chances of ever attaining real happiness.

If fun and pleasure are equated with happiness, then pain must be equated with unhappiness. But, in fact, the opposite is true: MORE TIMES THAN NOT, THINGS THAT LEAD TO HAPPINESS INVOLVE SOME PAIN.

As a result, many people avoid the very endeavors that are the source of true happiness. They fear the pain inevitably brought by such things as marriage, raising children, professional achievement, religious commitment, civic or charitable work, self-improvement.

Ask a bachelor why he resists marriage even though he finds dating to be less and less satisfying. If he's honest, he will tell you that he is afraid of making a commitment. For commitment is in fact quite painful. The single life is filled with fun, adventure, excitement. Marriage has such moments, but they are not its most distinguishing features. Similarly, couples who choose not to have children are deciding in favor of painless fun over painless happiness. They can dine out whenever they want.

Couples with infant children are lucky to get a whole night's sleep or a three-day vacation. I don't know any parent who would choose the word FUN to describe raising children.

But couples who decide not to have children never experience the pleasure of hugging them or tucking them into bed at night. They never know the joys of watching a child grow up or of playing with a grandchild.

Of course, I enjoy doing fun things. I like to play racquetball, joke with kids (and anybody else), and I probably have too many hobbies.
But these forms of fun do not contribute in any real way to my happiness.

More difficult endeavors--writing, raising children, creating a deep
relationship with my wife, trying to do good in the world--will bring me more happiness that can ever be found in fun, that least permanent of things.

Understanding and accepting that true happiness has nothing to do with fun is one of the most liberating realizations we can ever come to. It liberates time: now we can devote more hours to activities that can genuinely increase our happiness. It liberates money: buying that new car or those fancy clothes that will do nothing to increase our happiness now seems pointless. And, it liberates us from envy: we now understand that all those rich and glamorous people we were so sure are happy because they are always having so much fun actually may not be happy at all.

The moment we understand that fun does not bring happiness, we begin to lead our lives differently. The effect can be, quite literally,
life-transforming.

Get your high heel out of my uterus!

So while being nosy in Live Journal today I found this GREAT group post! Unfortunately you have to be a member to post there and they're closed to new members. BUT it's still a good read!

http://www.livejournal.com/community/sluts4choice/

I definately think that the people here need to send more letters to their "higher ups" because those guys are under the mistaken impression that we don't care as much about abortion rights as older women.

It scares the shit out of me to think that those rights could be taken away. Not because I need an abortion, or ever had one, or even ever might have one. It scares me because I think of the 14 year old girl who made a mistake, or the women who are raped, or the women who might die if they don't get one. Or the simple fact that it's my fucking body and I really don't want anyone telling me what I can and can't do with it.

I actually read an article in a big name magazine about how the pro-life/pro-choice battle is slowly headed toward pro-life. Now, that's scary shit. But the scarier part is the reason. The reason that it's headed that way is because "young" (mostly my age 23) women are #1. mis-informed- they don't think it can happen to them etc. & #2. they don't believe that it's necessacary with all the birth control options out there. Well, there may be a lot of birth control options out there, but they're not exactly cheap for women. Did you know that some insurance companies don't cover birth control for women? Or they do but only part way, so you're left footing a hefty bill?? It's simply not plausable for everyone.

I think we need to get a message across to the women who thing that it's ok to let someone tell you what to do with your body. We need to let them all know that we're not going to let them control our bodies, and our decisions. If we let them into our uterus what's next? Our right to vote, or even work? Because trust me, if they get control it's only a matter of time before they take it all away.

Maybe America is only the land of the free for men.

hhhHhhHHHhmmmMMMmmm...

Just bored, so something to keep me occupied. Sorry, no witty banter today.

You Are a Flashy Red Bra! Outgoing, friendly, and fascinating. You're a charmer, with your pick of the men. But you want a man who's as magnetic as you are. You need someone who can keep up with your all night gab fests! What Kind of Bra Are You? Take This Quiz :-) Find the Love of Your Life (and More Love Quizzes) at Your New Romance.

Your Life is Like Serendipity

What John Cusack movie are you? Take This Quiz :-)
Find the Love of Your Life (and More Love Quizzes) at Your New Romance.



Which Survivor of the Impending Nuclear Apocalypse Are You?
A Rum and Monkey joint.


Are You Damned?
Brought to you by Rum and Monkey


Which Colossal Death Robot Are You?
Brought to you by Rum and Monkey

Holier Than Thou...

Ever notice how people that are religious, I mean UBER religious, think that their religion is the ONLY one out there and everyone should convert? I can't stand people like that. My father-in-law happens to be one of those people about Catholocism.

If you really look at religion, and not really that hard either, you'd see that they're all basically the same damn thing. There is a God (of some sort) and he lives in "heaven". If you're good you get to go there. If you're bad there is a Devil (of some sort) and he lives in "hell"; if you're bad you get to go there.

But you know, all these people preaching that you should repent so you can go to heaven kindof scare me. I mean really, I don't want to go to heaven if it means that I have to hang out with those stupid fuckers.

Religion was basically invented (I believe) for 2 reasons. First, we as human beings can't fathom infinate space, time whatever. It's simply just too hard, and we don't have the mechanism in our brain to understand; or we do, but we just don't know how to use it. Second, it was invented to control people. And that's what it does to this very day. Those stupid people who blindly put their faith into whatever god they see fit, and then follow the people who preach the religion. This is how we got the assholes who bombed the Trade Centers.

I think it's time people opened up their own eyes and figured shit out for themselves.

mmMMMmmm Cake...

I LOVE this song, and I just thought I would share the love.

Cake: Short Skirt Long Jacket

I want a girl with a mind like a diamond
I want a girl who knows what's best
I want a girl with shoes that cut
And eyes that burn like cigarettes
I want a girl with the right allocation
Who's fast, and thorough, and sharp as a tack
She's playing with her jewelry, she's putting up her hair
She's touring the facility and picking up slack
I want a girl with a short skirt,
And a loooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooong jacket

I want a girl who gets up early
I want a girl who stays up late
I want a girl with uninterrupted prosperity
Who uses a Machete to cut through red tape
With fingernails that shine like justice
And a voice that is dark like tinted glass
She is fast, thorough, and sharp as a tack
She's touring the facility and picking up slack
I want a girl with a short skirt,
And a long, long jacket

Nanananananananananananananananananananananananananananana

I want a girl with a smooth liquidation
I want a girl with good dividends
At Citi Bank we will meet accidentally
We'll start to talk when she borrows my pen
She wants a car with a cup holder arm rest
She wants a car that will get her there
She's changing her name from kiddy to Karen
She's trading her mg for a white Chrysler le barron
I want a girl with a short skirt,
And a
looooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooong
jacket

Nanananananananananananananananananananananananananananana

Fit or Fat?

I have to get this out to my post before I forget that I'm as mad about it as I am. I'm currently watching Oprah, mostly because there's nothing else on. But the topic today is people who say they're married to someone different than who they originally married. Basically big changes in marriage.

The first one I caught was a couple where the man actually became a woman. He was transgendered and became a fully functioning woman. They're still married and still in love; however livning in celebacy.

The one directly after that was the one that pissed me off. This guy is pissed off that his wife isn't ask skinny as she was when they got married. First off, this situation pales in comparison to the couple directly before them on the show. But second of all Oprah was actually defending this asshole! The woman is overweight, I'll give him that, but she's still very beautiful.

He actually said that it's every man's dream to be married to a skinny woman. I'm waiving the big bullshit flag on that one! My husband loves me no matter how big or small I get. And I think he should be the same way. I don't think he really loves her, and that's really the problem.

Unfortunately, it's all back to society. Women are prettier (in my opinion) with enough meat on their bones not to see their bones. And to be truthful, it's not the weight (on or off) that makes you beautiful; it's your confidence and your personality. As cliche as it sounds it really is true.

Confidence is key.

Fucking Sunshine

Ok, so I'm a bit cranky for several reasons I'm sure. I'm tired, I'm hot, probably a little bit of PMS, and I have a killer migraine. Buuutt I'm going to post something that is important to me, and something I get funny looks for all the time.

The fucking sunshine! I can't stand it! It's hot and it makes me sweatty and uncomfortable, and I just plain hate it. I really love the rain. It doesn't mean that I like it to be 10 degrees outside or anything, I just like it when it rains.

Usually when I tell people this I get a cross eyed puppy dog head cock and they ask me "why?" (Or they look at me like I've just turned purple and killed their puppy!) Well, why not? I'll tell you why not...People listen to the goddamn media to fucking much! They tell you that you're happy when it's sunny and you're sad when it's rainy. Bullshit!

When it's sunny I'm hot and sticky and uncomfortable and I just can't stand being that way, so I'm not happy. Especially since I'm not the type of person to wear skimpy nothing clothing, not just because I'm not quite built for it, but I don't need to run around in my bra and panties; or any variation therof.

So, why not like the rain? I logged on to one site where you actually had to vote (on what it was I can't remember) the good was a sunshine and the bad was a rain cloud. Society needs to grow some balls!

I've only met one other person (so far) that would actually admit to me that she liked the rain, and didn't like the sunshine. Alice, you fucking rock! I like it when people stick up for shit they believe in, be it something small like the rain or something big like the president. But it all really comes down to society I think.

So when you get a chance, ask yourself "do I really like the sunshine or do I just say I do because of society?" and then it'll probably get you started on other topics, more important topics like the president, and gay rights and so on. So, in conclusion I LOVE the rain, and society needs to wake the fuck up. Just because you don't like it doesn't mean it's bad.

Thoughts

This is something my mom sent me the other day. Insightful...

The only thing permanent is the soul.

I have borrowed some protein and minerals which were organized by samples from my parents. They also gave me some protected opportunities to integrate with the body and form some of my operating system kernel useful to perception and control in an unfamiliar environment.

I entered a game of development and survival. At the end of the game I have either destroyed my vehicle or worn it out. During the game I will learn to find truth, be obedient, take charge and yield to the benefit of others...

We are not just a spoonful of the cosmic mush, we were individuals from the beginning and will remain individuals forever. See you on the other side. (Felix L. Goodman) NewsScan Daily, Nov 10, 1999...